Having a hard day today.....

     I am the mother of 4 wonderful kids. I have two boys and two girls. I have been blessed beyond words with these 4 gifts from God. 19 years ago I become mom for the first time of a beautiful boy. I was so scared didn't know if I was going to be able to do what a mom was supposed to do. I learn day by day and to this day I am still learning the job of been a mom. My son was the first grandkid and nephew on my side of my family. So Nana and aunt spoiled and loved this boy so much. We had nights were I was up with him because he was sick. My poor boy it took him a year in a half to finally get sick and surprise he gets a seizure. His temperature was so high but that little boy didn't show not signs of been sick. That event scare us to death. He had one more when he got sick and his temperature got so high. This time 911 was called because it took us a little longer to make him come out of it. Thank the Lord he grow out of this horrible seizures. He loved to sing Barney's songs and watch the videos. He knew every money and song. He also was in love with The Land before Time. He love and had all the movies. I loved to watch him when he will be watching the movies because he will know every word of the movie, will act and make the sounds of the movie and the best part he will sing every song. Those are moments that a MOTHER will never forget and we will always cherish. 

     It was finally time for him to go to school. He went his first 3 years of school at the same school where his father used to work. The time came for him to go to junior high and the to high school. Believe me when I said that those 4 years of high school went so fast. I just blink and it was done. I saw my son graduate high school. I wasn't looking forward to that time. I knew it was time for him to leave to college. I knew that I had to let him go and spread his wings but as a mom was so hard because I just want him by my side. Then surprise, surprise one day he comes home and sit in the living room with us and I knew he needed to share something with us. You know your kids and you know when they want to say something but they don't know how to say it. Well he shared with us that he had been talking to a Navy Recruiter and he was going to join the military. I was in shock and my mama hurt was on pain. I knew inside of me that he was making one of the best decision ever and I was proud of him for wanting to serve his country. But how do you make your mama hurt not to be in pain when you know your son will be gone and you won't see him very often. He left almost two weeks ago on Tuesday and it hasn't been easy to be without him. I haven't be able to talk to him. I'm just waiting for his call. We received his box with all his stuff that he took with him. It was so hard to open and take his stuff. Not an easy thing. I have so many people telling me to think that he went to college or got married. It's not like that people. A least you know that when your kid is in college or gets married you can call anytime or go and visit any time as well. But when our kids are in the military is not that easy and you can't compare it with been in college or been married.

     He will be graduating from boot camp at the end of June and then he will be leaving for school right away. Right now he is in Chicago. The sad thing and painful part of this is that I won't be able to attend his graduation because his dad and me will be flying to Chile for a mission trip. Oh man! this makes it more painful knowing that we wont be able to be there and see my son graduating from boot camp. I won't be able to see my son and hug him until August. That to me is an eternity.
Now I am here writing all this and you probably wondering why am I doing this? Well I just want it to share it to those moms who are going through the same thing and for them to know that they are not alone. Don't be ashamed to feel bad and hurt. Don't be afraid and ashamed to cry. Don't let anybody to let you think that what you are feeling during this time is silly because it's not silly. You as a mother have the right to cry, scream, been in pain, miss your kid during their time in the military. We should walk with our heads up because our kids are serving and protecting their country and it's people. We are proud mom's of kids who have choose and had made the right decision. They started been our kids and now they have become our HEROES. We as moms will help us keep us strong during this time. 

My baby just a few days old.

My baby graduating high school.

PROUD MOM OF A SON WHO IS IN THE NAVY.
MY CHILD HAS BECOME MY HERO.
MY BABY BOY WILL ALWAYS BE MY BABY BOY.
MISSING MY BOY SO MUCH THAT IT HURTS.
TRUSTING GOD AND LETTING HIM TAKE CARE AND GUIDE MY SON.
GOD YOU ARE IN CONTROL TAKE OVER.